As i sit looking up in the wind and rain of a Hawaii winter night sky, trying to shake the pain and disappointment of a University of Hawaii football drubbing at the hands of a very talented, well-coached, and yeah... quick University of Georgia team; i'm reminded of why it's so hard to be a fan. i mean, to be a fan is to basically ride the highs and lows of the accomplishments, or lack thereof of other people.
... think about it...
I'm not as rabid a fan as some people may be (and there are... millions of them in every state, county, and country), and i can feel the gut-wrenching agony and shame of defeat, especially when the loss comes on one of the biggest stages in American sports. When it comes down to it, however, there is nothing that i can do about it. lol Not that June Jones (head football coach) would want me out there trying to block Marcus Howard... let's just say i have a different skill set than ANY division 1A athlete. But there really is nothing that i could have done about it. The only thing that i can do is support the team in cheering, in well-wishes, in hoping and believing in them...none of which contributes to a win or a loss in a measurable way the same way running a 'Go' route and hauling in that 50 yard touchdown pass, or making that clean iso-block on a linebacker.
Being a fan is easy when things are good. Victory is as close as the TV remote and DVR. You won without doing anything really. It almost diminishes the time and effort it takes to train oneself to win on that level and on that stage. For example, it takes months of preparation, and years of working at it to get to a certain level. In the information age, we come to find out about stories of victory as they are being won, not during the years those wins have been built. No one sees the endless hours of preparation, or the grueling determination players much summon to prepare for the highest levels of play. As a fan, you win on their merit. You win on their heart. You win because someone has sacrificed....and it feels damn good to win. So good, people go their whole lives supporting causes that will hopefully give them that winning feeling.
The flip side is, that with all the cheering and praying, you feel the same sting of loss along with your team, player, or individual you cherish. Losing, especially in America is very bad socially. Losing denotes that you are a 'loser' and that your worth is somehow diminished because of the lack of performance.
This outlook differs greatly from the way God looks at us. Our worth is rather who we are, than what we can do. If we think about it, every good thing that we do is really attributed to His goodness and divine ability. We do great things because we are great, we are accepted, we are His children. We don't qualify to be accepted, loved, and respected because of the things we do. If it was like that, no one qualifies to go to heaven because we've all fallen short. No one would qualify to get blessings or 'breaks' in life. No matter how few of 'those' we've gotten in our lives, there is no one, who can say they have been non-existent. We should respond from a knowledge of goodness with great deeds, because it comes from us, because it is in us, because it IS us.
Part of the reason i love this crazy game that i play, is because the victories are personal. Yes, so are the losses... but there is nothing like the celebration from something that was personally accomplished. You won because you prepared, you believed, you acted, and you responded. You got that Jujitsu Gi because you camped that darned NM for weeks... you finally beat those mammets after 15 tries because you learned from your past mistakes, grew, evolved, found the weaknesses, and got together with a group of killer people who shared your vision, your goal, your desire. You found a way to afford that Hauby because you searched every site, farmed every worthwhile mob, monitored the prices and the market, and found a way to carve a niche for yourself in the economy.
These things make the game... and life full of excitement and wonder... it makes me want to do better... and I have to/want to believe these things carry over to my life
...as well as the one i live in Vanadi'el
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